To Judge or Be Judged

I’ll start today’s blog by acknowledging that social media is the root of all evil. Now that we agree, I can move on.

I, like many, scroll endlessly on social media out of boredom or addiction or both. I yearn to find dog videos since they automatically put me in a good mood but find they only fill a fraction of my time on these platforms which is total bullshit. MORE DOG VIDEOS PLEASE!

The art of conversation is gone and it has been overrun by passive aggressive judgmental posts. I’d be remiss if I didn’t come clean that I have called out people from time to time but it’s become much more brutal of late.

Here’s the part that I can’t get behind or understand. Truly, can’t.

People have come to an all-time low to judge others suffering.

Like the movie Groundhog Day, I see the same toned posts. How dare you complain about your suffering when there is other suffering going on?

So, it begs the question, is one suffering greater than the other. Is it mutually exclusive?

If you were to fracture both legs and I broke my finger, does it mean my finger hurts less than your broken legs or are we both suffering?

If a family member passes and your beloved pet passes does that mean that my heart should hurt less?

If I am under stress because I can barely make ends meet due to rising costs but around the world there is war, is my suffering or anxiety less? Aren’t both trying to protect their families including providing shelter and meals? Is it relatable? Can’t both parties suffer or is one not allowed to suffer because of the other?

What I’ve learned is judgment says more about the other person than yourself as it is based on assumptions.

Assumptions that being grateful and vocalizing my own suffering cannot be done simultaneously.

I mean, how can a person complain their child is on drugs? They should be grateful they are alive.

Get my point?

The parent will complain their child is on drugs because it’s horrible. Who wants a kid on drugs? Sometimes, there isn’t an upside. Sometimes complaining draws supports from the most unlikely sources and builds a community to lean on.

What if we don’t meet the criteria of someone else’s threshold of when complaining is permissible?

It comes down to the individual’s perception and own expectation of how others should react or behave. Comparisons are immediately drawn as to what they think we ought to be.

Judgment is forcing your views onto another. It’s a dissatisfaction of how others are and wanting them to become the way you want.

If only we all could shed the heavy burden of judging, we’d all carry a lighter load.

Can’t We All Just Get Along? Politics Driving Wedges in Friendships

I’ve always been interested in politics. I pride myself on trying to self-educate on the issues rather than rely on others rhetoric. It seems this year that the vast majority of American’s are trying to do the same.

 But here is something I have learned now more than ever.

Politics are dirty and not just with politicians. Waters are muddied when there are political differences among friends.

I find it frustrating and disheartening. What is the thread that binds us all regardless of party affiliations? Social media.

 People are passionate. I get it and appreciate the enthusiasm on both sides of the aisle. Our children’s future is at stake and we all want to leave the world a better place four years from now than it is today.

However, I’ve witnessed blanket insults intentional or not, directed at so called friends or acquaintances on social media. When I read comments from alleged friends that state “you must be brain dead to vote for Hillary” or “anyone that votes for Trump is a sexist and a bigot”, it’s a direct insult to anyone who may support either candidate.

 Like politicians, I find these Facebook political bullies to be just as hypocritical as the candidate they choose to back.

 These are the same people that post inspirational memes of love, peace and of unity. Irony!

This election has gutted common courtesy and dare I say, sense out of some “friends”. Would you dare spew such hateful remarks or words in a face to face conversation with a friend? If someone were to tell me I’m brain dead or I’m a racist and bigot, you’d bet that was the last conversation I’d ever have with that person.

 Last night I shared a friend’s status that I found hysterical. It was shared in the spirit of humor and nothing more. The status was tongue in cheek. Before I knew it, I had someone comment how they were surprised I supported this candidate.

 I have never publicly stated my views nor whom I’m voting for. I wouldn’t be that dumb lol.

I find others constant “calling out” of friends (again I’ll use that term loosely) antagonistic and bully like. To me, those tactics infringe on stepping into someone’s personal space. Challenging theories or healthy debate seems reasonable but has proven impossible in this climate.

As I step off of my soapbox, I’d like to reiterate that each of us as United States citizens are charged with doing our own fact checking and truth seeking to find the candidate who will best represents our ideologies. We are not obligated to convince others of our opinion nor are we beholden to sway others to our position.

I beseech each of you to loosen your grip and think twice before you sling that mud as you never know who will be hit intentionally or not by that throw.

Ask yourselves, are Clinton and Trump really worth losing friends over?

May God be with each of you and may Election Day come upon us with speed.